Before I begin, I would like to disclaim that these are just my thoughts, I have no intention of siding any party, and you should take it with a pinch of salt if my words does not cover the full extend of the situation.
From the many stories I have heard, I would come to think that your father is a rather grumpy, paranoid lonely man. But it would be utterly rude and foolish for me to make such a comment. I do not know the whole story, and who am I to make these comments? I am just an outsider.
From the many stories I have heard, there is no doubt your father has no clue on how to show his love, nor does he have any idea on what empathy is about. But I think it is because of the inability to connect with his daughter, that makes him very frustrated, and this frustration spills onto everyone around him, creating this unpleasant atmosphere in the house. I think I understand your pain, the feeling of loneliness at a place that is supposedly homely and warm.
From the many stories I have heard, I also believe that he still loves his daughter, he still loves you.
I might be foolish, do tell me if I am foolish. But all I wanted to do, is to see the bright side, see you happier.
ps. what really struck me about your father is the devotion he has, the weekly Saturday dates which he has been bringing his loved ones out for since his courtship days.
